Thursday, May 15, 2008

the performer performs

LINCOLNESQUE is going well. we opened last thursday and tonight had our first performance of the second and final weekend. 8 shows total.
we got a good review in the san antonio express-news, and a sort of hard-to-tell-if-she-liked-it-or-not review in the san antonio current.
my whole family came to see the show last saturday, and that was a good show for me. a lot of my students have come too, which is sweet. theatre friends from all around san antonio have also been extremely supportive.
two more weeks of school. i have started final performance exams in class. yesterday a hoola-hoop performance was breathtaking. today, a boy who wrote his own song sang and accompanied himself on guitar beautifully, poignantly. 
friend beth is going to siberia in july.
my south america plans yearn to be solidified.
life is good.

Friday, May 09, 2008

terrible acknowledgement of kid sabotage (taks)

schools in texas are under the weight of a test called the texas assessment of knowledge and skills, or taks test. schools are rated and ranked based on the results from these tests. as a result, the tests are strictly monitored, stringently directed, and anal-retentively administered. 
today i got called into my assistant principal's office. i have enjoyed a relatively good relationship with this man; we have never been pals, but have been perfectly cordial. today's meeting however was somewhat unpleasant.
it started out innocent enough. 
ME: you wanted to see me?
HIM: i saw on this report that you didn't attend the training for the TAKS test. can you tell me why?
ME (glibly): i don't know.
HIM: why not? this is very important.
ME: oh. really? you're not being sarcastic?
HIM: no, not at all. 
ME: oh.
(moment of adjustment.)
ME: well, that was a busy week, we were getting ready for state, all kinds of things were happening. but i got my training later and everything worked out fine.
HIM: your colleague didn't miss the training and i assume he too was preparing for state...
ME: i would like to say that i did all the TAKS paperwork perfectly. the counselors in the office said that a lot of the teachers didn't turn it in correctly but that mine was all done right.
HIM: did you ever stop to think that because you required a separate training time from all the other teachers, you were taking valuable time away from the counselors who had to stop what they were doing in order to train you separately?
...
basically what happened was, i got reprimanded, nay threatened, because i did not attend the TAKS training session. the threat: this breach will go on my teacher evaluation. 
"what does that mean?" i asked, the glibness having vanished, being replaced by a confrontational defensiveness.
"it means it goes on your report. if you think of some good reason why you missed the training, let me know."
"no, i can't think of any reason." i said, trying to leave.
"of course, the TAKS is the most important ranking our school has; the only thing that would be more important would be our football team winning state."
"well i guess i just don't share your priorities."
"i was joking."
"really? i couldn't tell."
"this is not to downplay your second place with the one-act play at state. of course that's a nice feather in your cap. but blah blah blah blah blah....."
...
i spent my eighth period theatre class sitting and talking to a few students, watching a few playing ball, watching some practice martial arts, listening to one play the guitar as he strolled around the room. i was thinking how nice it was to sit and relax and enjoy the students as people and not expect anything of them. it was really nice. i needed it, and i think they did too.
...
ME (what i should have said): i have had several students tell me that i have made a difference in their lives. i have had a few say that they would not have taken or stayed in theatre if it weren't for me. i waste no time in worrying about TAKS requirements when i remember what i am really here for-- to teach students, and to learn from students. i refuse to, and indeed am unable to, change my priorities to reflect a meaningless standardized test simply in order to achieve a rank among people who understand very little about education.


Saturday, May 03, 2008

plays and life

well it's been a week and i'm just now feeling able to write about this year's one-act play experience. 
our play was called DA. it was written in the 70's by an irish playwright named hugh leonard, and he always claimed this one was his favorite. he got awards for it. it's about a man who goes back home to clean out his parents' house after his father's death. his memories start coming up before his eyes and he interacts with them-- his father, mother, and himself at a younger age. 
our cutting of DA was mostly a comedy, though the full-length play is actually quite dark. i must admit that our cutting excluded much of the complication the main character faces in dealing with his past and what he's become. you can understand: when you are cutting something down to 40 minutes, for use by a high school drama troupe, the things you keep tend toward the light. 
this year, the state one-act play meet was not at bass concert hall, but at hogg auditorium, right in the middle of the UT campus. we weren't looking forward to this new location-- an older building, a smaller stage. but i must say that hogg was very kind to our play, which lends itself to a more intimate setting. also, being more central on the UT campus, it felt more like being in austin.
like last year, we woke up very early on saturday morning and headed over to load our props and furniture into the back of the theatre. we were reprimanded by the director for having so much stuff. because hogg is such a smaller space than bass, everyone was expected to pare down on set items. our 7-foot rolling prop cabinet had to be removed. there was a meeting with all the casts and directors at 7:30. at 8:45 our official rehearsal began. we were the first to rehearse, since we were the first to perform. our rehearsal went well-- we set up the stage, put spike tape down to indicate where everything should be placed according to the lights, we set sound levels, ran through blocking. a couple of our items were not approved (the holy water font, which i always hated, was made of a ticket-taking cabinet. it was the one thing i had wanted to change but never got changed, until it was un-approved at our rehearsal), so we had to improvise a bit with set pieces. the UIL crew was very helpful, even the man who did not like my vines last year. 
we had several hours between rehearsal and performance, during which we ate at stubb's, rested, and did warm-ups. as we waited behind the theatre at 3:30, baking in the sun, some of the other students came to wish everyone broken legs. trevor gave me an amazing bouncy-ball filled with sparkly magenta liquid. for me that ball became an icon representing the entire experience-- there was a certain perfection in it which delighted and encouraged everyone. i know it sounds strange, but for me it was really remarkable: it became a representative of joy, resilience, and the passing nature of everything. it made a strong impression, but at the same time i realized it didn't have long to live. just like the whole experience.
the performance was lovely-- everything went smoothly, nobody fell down, things clicked, and the show ran 38.50 or thereabouts, which is perfect. cy was there, as were a good fan club from churchill. 
after loading out of the theatre and back into the moving truck, we gave ourselves a little time to get food in the area, which was when i experienced jamba juice. the smoothie i consumed comes as close to orgasmic as anything i've ever had. maybe my senses were heightened; maybe i was just glad the performance was over. in any case, that smoothie, like that bouncy-ball, rocked my world.
we saw the second session of plays in the evening-- all good productions. the awards ceremony started very soon after the final show was over. we took two "all-star cast" awards and one "honorable mention" award for acting, and we took 2nd place in the competition.
my eyes see clearly. i don't want to go all esoteric on you. right now i feel truly alive. i must always remember this feeling, i tell myself, this is who you really are, an extension of the earth, someone who can appreciate joy and beauty, who is sensitive to struggle and suffering, but has roots deep enough to bend and come back to stretch his arms into the sky. 
the amazing bouncy-ball didn't even last a whole week. it was hurled against brick walls, thrown in the football field, squeezed, gazed at, and admired until it passed away quietly in my car on wednesday. i don't have the heart to throw it away. i feel it should be cremated or something. it's pretty funny, how certain objects are endowed and can teach you things. i will never forget this bouncy-ball.
four more weeks of school. 
LINCOLNESQUE opens in 5 days. 
today i'm going to thrift stores to get pants, shirts, shoes, and suspenders. 
barry, if you read this: i tried to send you an email but it got returned. do you have a new email address?