a few weeks ago, prodded by a friend of mine, i set up a facebook account... begrudgingly. i don't know why i was so reluctant. i guess it seemed like something 'young' people do, like people of my students' age. and true enough, most of my contacts have been former students, but there have been other contacts as well, like theatre people in the area.
but this week i had two great surprises.
there comes a time on facebook when you start racking your brain for old, old friends-- like the kind of friends who are so old they've become kind of legendary in your mind, because all your memories of them have been so rehashed over the years, and it's been so long since you've spoken to them.
one of the friends i got in touch with was philip, my next-door neighbor from childhood. we had a lot of fun together doing kid things, and he had a pool at his house AND a tennis court we played on. i wasn't sure he would want to contact me, because i was kind of a weirdo as a kid (i'm TOTALLY normal now, make no mistake), but phil wrote back and asked how the hell i am. he is now living in phoenix and has a little family going.
there was an even bigger reaction, however, last night, when my best friend from first, second and third grade (my first, and therefore truest best friend) responded to my friend invitation. his name is j.j. and i have all kinds of memories and stories about him. i hadn't seen or spoken to him since he moved away to tucson after fourth grade. nary a word. so you can imagine, over the past thirty years there's been plenty of time to miss him, wonder where he is, and think about all the things we did as kids. this is the kid i loved so much that i threw a rock at his head. it's true.
last night all my long-standing questions about j.j. came to a resolution. he's an aerospace engineer (he was always really smart), has a wife and three kids, and lives in nearby austin. he looks great in his photo, still like himself and not transformed by the overwhelming grief of life. i don't know if we will keep in touch or rekindle our friendship, but the important thing is just to know he's well and thriving in the world, and that he actually does exist outside my memory. it's a nice feeling and... well, it's a life-changing event.
2 comments:
so cool.
I've always wondered about old friends I've lost touch with but I've never thought about trying to use facebook to try and make those connections. I, too, set up a facebook account a few weeks ago. I haven't quite learned how to use it, but I still log in every once in a while.
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