mower

more! more! there should be MORE posts on here! not one a week, dammit! there should be at least three a week!
well what should i write about?
anything! your rage! your tenderness! your utter apathy!
speaking of apathy...
the most recent assignment in theatre class is to write a monologue describing your own death. you can be old, young, or in between. you have to write it from your own point of view, and memorize it, and perform it for the class. i saw my 2 classes do these monologues last week and they were, for the most part, pretty darn interesting. people died in all kinds of ways. they were beaten, hit by vehicles, stricken by disease, and there were a couple of suicides. though the assignment sounds morbid, the students really seemed to get into it... a lot of them showed sides of themselves they hadn't shown before. one of my more thoughtful students decided to die of apathy. afterwards i asked her why she chose that, and she said she'd noticed that a lot of the kids she knew didn't seem to care about anything.
i care about things. but sometimes i feel forced to care about things i don't care about at all, like our current musical at the school. it has gobbled up time and space, and this week it will probably make all our theatre classes moot. i wanted to have nothing to do with it, but guilt has gotten the better of me and i am helping out with costumes. it's hard to be in this position of being 1/4th involved. i don't like it at all. in a week it will be over and i can move on to something i do care about, the one-act play.
last week i found out that my cutting of a lie of the mind had been rejected by the UIL state office because i didn't follow the rules in the way i submitted it. it was a hard blow. we were getting somewhere in rehearsal, and it got pulled out from under us. it sucked. so we're doing a one-act version of the seagull, which was already on the UIL "approved" list and which we have some experience with. it's ok. it will be fine. i'm currently waiting on the four van itallie translations i ordered in a blind fever to show up.
i'm not in a blind fever. in fact i'm clear and lucid. maybe that's what makes it so difficult!